5 Tips to Rediscover Fun as a Mom
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"What do you do for fun?" My brother asked, and I totally froze. Have you ever had a moment like that? For me, it's that question or the hobby one. "Do you have any hobbies?"
Nothing makes me overthink my life like a question that makes me wish I could say yes when the answer is no.
The only thing that came to mind was writing. But I didn't want to say "writing." What a dumb answer! Right?
Shortly after, a couple of books seemed to come into my life at the perfect time.
from my instagram stories
The book Create Anyway seemed to pop up everywhere. Part of the description says “But what if you could pursue your God-given creative gifts alongside motherhood, for the enrichment of both experiences? What if you stopped viewing creativity as a selfish act, and started to see it as essential to your own flourishing as a mother?”
get it on Amazon.ca | get it on Amazon.com
I loved being creative before kids, but I had begun believing it wasn't possible to be creative and have fun in this season as a new two-under-two mom.
I began reading, eagerly hanging on every word of possibility.
Weeks later, when visiting my parents, my mom showed me her new book, Chase the Fun.
I used to struggle with books like this. I would have read the title “100 Days” and thought “ha. I can do it in 50.” And when I missed a day or two, I would have been filled with guilt and missed out on learning and enjoying the process. I would have let productivity take over my enjoyment.
But now, I pay no attention to how many days or hours a book thinks it will take me. I'm content to pick it up on the days I pick it up and let it be on the days I let it be. I'll even read a section two or three times if it resonates with me.
Armed with these two books, I began to start thinking more seriously about creativity and fun as pursuits that had a place even in my life as a busy mom.
Those hours I spend watching TV with my husband in the evening? A perfect opportunity to learn a new creative hobby like embroidery or watercolour! Just for fun - with no pressure to make something perfect or monetize my new hobby.
This inexpensive kit got me started!
That sacred 40-minute window when naps overlap? The perfect opportunity to let the breakfast dishes sit and ACTUALLY give myself time to write!
Pesky thoughts try to convince me everything I do has to serve a purpose or earn an income. But my regular rhythms now include time and space to create and have fun!
How to Rediscover Fun for Yourself
If you ALSO don’t know how to describe what you do for fun, here are my top 5 tips:
Manage expectations
Maybe before you had kids “fun” was a spontaneous midnight ice cream date or hours reading in a backyard hammock. Do I need to tell you its going to look different now?
But I see this as a good thing! Motherhood gets a bad rap for changing us. You’re definitely not the person you once were. Trying to live like you are will hurt. But if you lean into the changes, I know you will find NEW ways to have fun and discover NEW parts of your personality.
Look for opportunities
Don't overcomplicate this. If strapping your kids in the car and going through a drive-thru sounds fun, try it! If jumping on the trampoline or rolling down the hill with your kids feels fun, you're doing it! If watching a funny movie with your husband and learning to crochet while you do it seems fun, see how it feels! If taking the kids to the zoo sounds fun, do it!
Follow the whim and see how it goes. What's the worst that can happen? If it isn’t fun, don’t do it again.
Don't shame yourself for what feels fun
As I said, the first thing that popped into my head was writing. I spent YEARS shaming myself for wanting to write. I wasted a lot of time I could have spent having fun!
I feel more like myself when I take time to write, whether it’s a few minutes of peaceful alone time or tapping out thoughts on my phone while my daughter plays in the sand (like right now).
What is it for you? What do you criticise yourself for wanting to pursue?
Don't try to monetize it or make it productive
Fun is supposed to be fun! If you set a bunch of goals or try to make money, it might suck the joy right out of it.
You don’t need to be good at an activity for it to be fun. This has been a huge struggle for me with both embroidery and watercolour. I’m by no means good at watercolour painting. But when I stop being so hard on myself, the fun begins!
Reevaluate often
You'd think fun would come more naturally to us right? It did when we were kids! I think it's important to constantly reevaluate what feels fun and what doesn't. We’re constantly evolving, and what felt fun last year might not be fun anymore. You have permission to change your mind.
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Conclusion
I hope you decide to implement some of these tips to rediscover fun! I’d love to hear all about it. Send me a DM on Instagram and let me know how it goes!
